Most of you who read my blog know that I have been on a mission for the last few years to figure out what I want to be when I grow up.

I thought I would be there by now. I'm not.

Instead I find myself like a kid in a candy store. So excited to try everything new that comes into view. I am dizzy with the love of learning. I find myself energized to learn more about anything and everything that interests me. (Even stuff I didn't think even interested me before.) I have read so many books, listened to stacks of books on tape, and my subject matter is so varied I'm pretty sure the people at the library think I am a little nuts. (Hooray for library books being free to check out).

I cannot imagine what my life would be like if I hadn't been allowed, or allowed myself this opportunity to just "be" for a while, to take the time to figure myself out -- especially now that I can see clearly how much I needed it.

Lately I have been able to use what I have learned to help others in need of figuring themselves out. What a fantastic feeling!

If not for the "little" detail of having to contribute money into our bank account sometime soon, all would be at peace in me. I love using what I know to encourage, motivate and help others move forward. You know that question that people ask: What would you do for FREE because you love it? That is what I would do for free: help people understand themselves and give them strategies to help them move forward. It is what I love to do. It is what makes me feel like I make a difference.

In the past 5 months I have learned so much about myself. And it has helped me understand others so much better.

I've learned about Strength. Shame. Fears. Purpose. Passion. Energy. Love. Surrender. Serendipity. Trust. Natural talents. Positivity. Happiness. And Joy.

Once I took the first step forward to begin facing a few of my longtime fears, it helped me realize that what I needed to do most-- was let go. To stop wasting so much energy trying to take control of things that were clearly not for me to worry about.  Once I started letting go of the control, and began slowing my life down, I was able to see what it is that I do best (and easily).

I am at heart a coach and facilitator, an educator and a mentor, a catalyst for forward motion and growth.

I believe I have now found my "sweet spot".

For a long time I ignored that I had a sweet spot because I could not see how it would help me find that next job/that encore career. I focused instead on all the skills a resume screams for, and I failed to acknowledge that I have a talent for understanding people, for asking questions that open them up to new ways of thinking, and for helping them learn to help themselves.

It has always been easy for me to champion the potential of others, now I need to learn to believe in me.

You see even after discovering what my "element" was, I slowed my own forward progress because I listened to the dark voice inside that convinced  me I was not good enough, or that I needed a different college degree to prove my worth, or that I couldn't possibly go into business doing what I love to do and being successful at it.

And yet, here I am. Poised to move in the direction of my dreams. That vision board of 4 years ago is finally making sense....

Ironic that in trying to figure out what I wanted to "do" next, what I want to "be" when I grew up, I discovered something even greater. I discovered who I really am at the core.

I am not at the place I thought I would be by now.

Instead... I'm in an even better place. Comfortable in my own skin, for maybe the first time ever.

Question of the Week #26 / When was the last time you did something for the first time?

It is not a secret to anyone who knows me that I have spent the last few years struggling to find my place in the world. What is super weird is that up until 2009 I had spent my whole life on a direct path, in fact you could say I always knew exactly where I was headed. And then seemingly overnight, I lost my way (or maybe it is more appropriate to say I began to find my way). I veered off course and have been taking a series of new paths, most of which have dead ended, ever since.

Who knew I was heading off in search of my encore career; where I could make a living while making a difference?

Yesterday as I was turning away from the non-fiction new releases shelf at the library, with three new books under my arm, I felt a weird sense that I was missing something important. I scanned through the new titles seeing nothing relevant. Just as I was about to give up, The Encore Career Handbook, by Marci Alboher and its very relevant tagline “How to make a living AND a difference in the second half of life” jumped out at me.

I had heard the words “encore career” from someone a few weeks earlier and hadn’t yet followed up on the lead. So finding this book was a sign for me. And sure enough from page one I felt an immediate sense of relief that I was not alone and I wasn’t going crazy (or worse yet), having a senior moment.  There are others in the world like me, possibly 31 million others according to the book, who are currently in flux and in search of meaningful work. In fact it is fast becoming the new normal for those of us in our second half of life.

To those that attempt to label older workers I suggest you stop trying to quash us. Quash: to put down or suppress completely, to subdue; set aside. I cannot speak for all over 50 workers, but I can say that I am far from done. The book has given me hope that I can, and will, figure out my next move.

I am not an old dog. I can be taught new things, in fact, I am anxious to learn. I will make money and make a difference. Quite possibly my encore “job” will not be labeled a job at all, but rather a “purpose”.

There is great power in purpose, and in numbers. Look out, world-- as soon as those of us in search of our encore careers find our way--we will proudly be showing off our tricks.

If you liked this, you may also want to read:

My Second Half of Life

Links:

http://psychcentral.com/news/2012/09/27/you-can-teach-an-old-dog-new-tricks/45219.html

It's been seven weeks into the new year already and I'm guessing that many of you have quit working on that personal growth effort you started on January 1. Either things got too busy, you lost interest, or you realized there were no easy answers. I have recently recognized how valuable it is to know myself and am using that knowledge daily as I figure out my next move. I'm hoping this week's question will shed some inner light on what makes you tick, and kickstart your desire to become a better you.

Question of the Week #7

I feel most energized when___________________. (Make a list).

Are you aware of the things that energize you? This question comes in part from the experience I just went through quitting my job--a perfectly good job, exciting even, but one that at the end of the day didn't leave me energized. It left me drained and dragging. Recognizing that I needed to make a change, or the job was going to change me, I chose to leave it behind.

So let's dig deeper. Are you the kind of person who thinks things out, or who talks them out? Does a creative and quiet activity or a loud and collaborative discussion get you going?

You can also approach this week's Question of the Week by thinking about what drains your energy. Once you know that, you should be able to figure out the reverse.  Have you ever determined if you are an introvert or an extrovert? The situations that push the limits of most introverts... a crowded networking event, a chaotic potluck at school or church, a workshop filled with lots of deep discussion often leave them exhausted. The more introverted your personality, the more you will wish for peace and solitude when you return home.  The extroverts will come home exhilarated and filled with ideas and energy.

Still not sure? Keeping a journal is another way to keep track of why some situations left you dragging and others left you with energy to spare. What were the differences; was it the people involved, your level of responsibility there, the size of the event itself? Getting you to think deeper about your personality, and to become aware of what brings energy (and passion) into your life, helps you prepare to be your own battery charger.

My Answers

I feel most energized when....

• I have just been a part of a deep discussion
• I see forward progress
• I improve something
• I share stories, or learn something new
• I am in charge of making something happen
• I know that I helped someone see something from a new perspective
• my opinion has made a difference
• I inspire someone
• I learn something new
• I meet new people
• my intuition was right

If the subject of introvert vs extrovert is interesting to you check out the book by Laurie Helgoe called Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength or  Quiet: the Power of Introverts by Susan Cain.

May your next week be full of many things that energize YOU.

P.S.S. Susan Cain is coming to speak at GRCC at Fountain Street Church on March 13 and I'm going.

This week I started sharing the news with everyone that I am leaving my current job. It's weird to talk about, especially when you don't have anywhere specific to move to, and because I am not old enough to actually just "retire".  It makes for longer conversations, and some interesting reactions.

Bewilderment, Awkwardness, Pessimism, Optimism, Jealousy, Admiration, and one I didn't count on Camaraderie.  Telling my story seems to invoke some serious "girl power" and a kind of a "you go girl" attitude from other women. I love that.

It also seems to be an open invitation for other women who have been secretly harboring their own dreams, to share them with me. I really love that. Who knew that me taking a step toward my dreams would help others give a voice to theirs?

So this week's question is this: If money were no object, what would you do for free just because you love it?

Take out the thoughts about figuring out something that makes good money. And the concern about whether anyone would pay you to do it. Put aside the self-doubt, and all those practical thoughts... and just imagine what you would do if you could do whatever you wanted. What would life be like?

Don't be discouraged if you don't have an immediate answer....sometimes it takes time to bring dreams to the surface. And experimentation. This exercise is not to clearly point you in your life's direction but to get you thinking about the things you'd do if you had the time and the chance.

My Answer

My answer to this question is not clear. Which is why I am on my current journey  and going "off the safe & responsible path"....to see if I can clarify. Partly by trying things and deciding what I don't want to do by process of elimination. Here is what I do know...

• I know I'd spend time with youth--mentoring and teaching things I think are important: truth, responsibility, self-confidence, purity of intentions and encouraging kids to make something of their lives, by believing in themselves. It seems to come back to an afterschool program or a life skills high school class. Does that mean I want to teach?
• I'd write more, maybe I'd even write a book--I know I'd blog more. And I'd interview people and write their stories for publication.  Does that mean I want to be a feature writer?
• I'd continue exploring this idea I have to work amongst a cooperative group of women, each of us bringing to the table what we do best, and doing it from wherever we do it best;  our homes, a coffee shop, our office space. We'd do it better than it's ever been done. Does that mean I want to own a business? Or start a club of sorts?
• I'd spend time helping others uncover their strengths and help them operate from their "sweet spot". Does that mean I want to be a life coach?
• And I'd cook, trying recipes, tweaking them and sharing them. I love entertaining people I love with food. Does that mean I want to publish a recipe book?

I am able to answer this question, only it seems to make more questions for me. Be prepared that it might make more for you as well. What I am shooting for in my own life is to eventually answer it like my friend did this week. She said: I want to bake. I want to own my own company, and bake for people. She has a name for her company, an idea of what her logo will look like, and a clearly defined dream. I'm so proud of the progress she has made in the last couple of weeks, the certainty and strength of this dream seems to grow each time she talks about it.  I've already hired her for an event I am in charge of, and I plan to do all I can to help make her dream happen. I'm all about girl power and helping to make dreams come true...now if only I could define my own so clearly.

So what is your dream: will you share it? Do you know it? Write down what you'd do if money were no object... or if you are like me, write down the many things you'd do if making money were no object.

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I'm excited to announce that tomorrow I will be adding a regular feature to my blog called: The Question of the Week.

The Question of the Week will be posted every Friday and is designed to encourage deeper thinking about yourself, your life, your passions, and your strengths & weaknesses. It is my hope that answering them will facilitate personal growth for all who participate.

Why dig deeper?

While I believe that it is never too late to begin understanding yourself, I also believe you should pay attention from a young age to the things that make you go “aha” and fill you with passionate energy. No matter what stage of life you are in, answering The Question of the Week will help you uncover your passions, highlight your interests and help you understand yourself better.  It may even help you determine what you want to be when you grow up, what you want to do next in life, or where you want to be ten years from now. Who knows, the life you truly desire might become clearer.

We all hope for happiness and personal fulfillment in our home lives and our work lives. The first step in achieving them is to truly begin to understand ourselves. And that takes commitment and courage. I challenge you to answer these 52 questions and to invest in your potential in 2013.

Because I know that together we can grow and keep each other on track, I will be answering the questions right along with you. I’d love to create a dialogue around our answers. Feel free to comment on the blog, email me privately, or share your thoughts with me in person if you know me in the real world….. I'm here to listen, to learn and to help.

First Question of the Week posts tomorrow. 7 am. Will you be ready?