I’ve been thinking for a while about what I wanted to say in this post. And not just because it is Thanksgiving. What I have to say applies to the other 364 days of the year as well.

Dear amazingly talented beautiful-hearted women in my life:

I hesitate to tell you exactly how much you have shaped me the past couple of years because I am afraid that you will think I brought nothing to the table of our friendship.

Yet if I just say thank you, how can you even begin to know how deep my gratitude goes?

The thank you I am talking about is a thank you from the bottom of my heart (and soul). Because in many ways, you saved me.

You played a huge part in helping me find myself again. In so many little every day ways you showed me by your example how I could feel better in my body, be happier, and live freer. Your unique stories have opened my heart and inspired me to take risks that I might not have dared to before. You have helped me understand that I am not the island I once felt I was.

I am part of a tribe of strong, talented, uniquely inspiring women.

We are different; but we are so much the same.

From that common ground I not only have become wiser about understanding you, but also wiser about understanding myself.

I realize that your fears are also my fears.

Of not being enough. Of not being good enough. Of not being worthy.

I recognize that your sincere wishes are also my sincere wishes. To be appreciated for our talents, and not defined by our weaknesses. To feel our contributions have meaning and that our efforts at making the world a better place are both noticed and appreciated.

We wish to be free of the junk that weighs us down.

We desire to be loved and cherished for exactly who we are, even as we morph and grow.

We aspire to be the person we were always meant to be.

We need to believe that we are worthy of living the life of our dreams.

We deserve to be cherished, respected and loved by those that matter most.

Thank you women in my life for also standing up to show me the error of my ways.

For being my mirror. For reflecting back to me all those parts of me I was scared to see.  And shining a light on all your unique qualities that I hope to someday call mine.

For helping me see I was more than I thought I was. And more than I thought I ever could be.

Thank you for using your light to shine a path for me.

For patiently believing in me, even when I did not believe in myself.

For gently redirecting me when I veered off course.

For supporting all my crazy ideas.

And for doing everything you could to encourage me to continue to find my path and follow my heart.

Thank you for taking the lead when I had lost my way and for graciously letting me lead when I needed to believe I could.

For not judging me when I may have jumped to judge others.

For loving me when I didn’t love myself.

For showing me that bending does not mean breaking.

And for explaining that asking for help is a gift to those who love you most.

Thank you for your grace in making me feel that my talent is no less valuable than yours.  And for your empathy, compassion & understanding.

And most especially for calling me bad ass when I felt shaky about my own power.

Women in my life you are all glorious beacons of light and hope, not only for me, but for generations of women to come.

I admire your courage, I honor your truth. And I will never take you for granted. I am not only thankful for you, I LOVE you.

From the bottom of my heart I wish you all a Peace + Gratitude filled Thanksgiving.

--Namaste

I love it when people call me fearless.

I also dread it.

Especially when my inner voice screams "not true, you are not fearless, not by a long shot."

I suppose I believe that if  I were truly fearless then I would march off and take action on the things I believed in, and in doing so would make a difference in the world around me. As I write this I am realizing that I have not fully grown past the if, then  futuristic thinking pattern that once ruled me. I thought I had.

To me standing in your personal truth, believing in yourself, and allowing your dreams to grow wings --those actions spell fearless to me. And if that is my gauge, no wonder I fall so far short of believing that I am capable of fearless.

A truly fearless person would go after what they want.

I don't do that well. I still find reasons (or excuses) to procrastinate, to abort, or to divert. I allow myself to get caught up in way too many detours and distractions. Self-sabotage?

I've tried at different times in my life to take action in what seems like the right direction, but I end up letting my inner voice (or someone else' s voiced fears) stop me in my tracks. I've wondered if my heart was not truly into those ideas I left behind, or if I am just scared of committing fully to a path in case it is the "wrong" one. Whatever the reason, I begin things with enthusiasm and passion, and then I stall.

There should be no fear in truth.

Why are so many women of my age afraid to stand fully in our truth?  Is it because we have been taught to worry about what it looks like from the outside, a what-will-the-neighbor's-think mentality we inherited from our mothers and grandmothers? Or is it fear?

We really should be worried more about how it feels on the inside, than what it looks like on the outside---shouldn't we?

Creativity, whether with words, a paintbrush, a camera, a sewing machine, a series of music notes, lies within all of us. And it is nothing short of scary to share outwardly what comes from the deepest parts of our soul. Yet we cannot allow ourselves to stay safe in our skin, never expressing  fully what we feel in our soul, or it will extinguish our light.

The truth, who we really are, is deep within our soul. It is in that creative space where all our  goodness and brokenness awaits the chance to fully express itself. To shine a light outward and make our unique difference.

A truly fearless person would have already written the book I tell people I am writing. They would have let go of the negative thoughts that they aren't really a writer, or they aren't a good enough one anyway. And they would let go of thinking they have nothing unique or original enough to share.

I need to let my light shine. In my own unique words. And I need to do it without expectation and without worrying about the consequences.

I took a step today in the direction of fearless. I signed up to attend the Storyline Writers Conference this fall outside of Chicago. Investing in my dream. Investing in me.

As I continue to evolve and grow into the best me I can be, I thank those who see me as fearless. Your support encourages me to keep going. To keep trying. To believe in myself.

I am pretty sure I see fearless, and she is just around the corner.