Of course I really don’t know the secret of life, but I have learned the hard way we make life more difficult than it has to be. To me, the answers you seek come when you stop trying to be something or someone you are not, when you quit wishing or thinking you need to be different than you already are. Accepting who you are, just as you are, is the key to greater happiness.

I wish my formative years in school had taught me more about how to figure out who I was at my core, or showed me how to embrace and utilize the talents that made me unique, instead of instilling a feeling of lack in me because of my differences. For years I tried so hard to be like everyone else, only to find I didn’t even like the person I became. I wanted in that moment of realization to go back to the days of my youth, before I convinced myself I was not enough, to sit under my favorite tree and breathe, daydream, and just be happy in my own skin. It was in those early years and those quiet moments I recall not “trying” at anything, and in those times of just “being”, I was happy and I was enough.

After I started on my ridiculous quest to be “perfect”, the noisy voice in my head constantly told me I needed to do better. I was always striving, achieving, comparing, and judging myself against everyone I met. I kept myself busy “doing”, so the mean voice would have nothing to complain about. It didn’t stop her, and it became overwhelmingly exhausting to stay ahead of the inner reproach I heard. When I came across a person with great natural talent, I did not celebrate their talent with them as I should have, I worried that I did not possess the same. I judged myself and deemed myself lacking in every area. It went on so long I truly believed I had no natural talents at all, and considered myself a failure.

I wish I had been taught at a young age that talent comes in all shapes and sizes, that not everyone needs to like or be smart at math, to remember dates in history, or to know their geography. If I could gather up all the time I wasted trying to shore up my weaknesses and instead had focused it on what I did easily, what might be different for me today? Maybe I would have written that book by now. Why do we not show our little ones that natural talents can be things like inclusivity, empathy, creativity? My sensitivity is a natural talent; I understand that now. Being highly sensitive to your surroundings, to energy around you, knowing what people mean even if they aren’t speaking the words out loud, seeing the big picture, making connections quickly, having the ability to adjust things to make others feel comfortable, those are not things everyone is born able to do. I wish I would have accepted these as my natural talents a long time ago.

Certain talents are more outwardly recognized and appreciated, especially in work situations. But all talents deserve to be applauded and utilized. In my opinion a baker who creates unique creations without a recipe is just as talented as a robotics engineer. We all have our own innate abilities, and those are what make us unique beings. I believe everyone is their happiest when they are working from their strengths.

I guess what I am really saying is, the secret to happiness is within all of us. We all need to uncover, discover and utilize our own natural talents. The talents that lie deep within us need to be shared in order for us to shine. Life is not supposed to be lived continually swimming upstream, rather it should be doing what we do best, and flowing through life with happiness and ease.

I hope in leading by example I can illuminate this lesson to others; the power is within you. Are you ready to unlock your own secret of life, find your natural talents, and put them to use? The time is NOW.