Into the Light
I never used to think much about light and dark, good and bad, or energy and spirits, but recent events have me thinking about them a LOT.
I've learned that within everyone there is light, and there is darkness. And some of us are fortunate enough to operate in the light far more often than we spend time struggling in the dark.
Being a person who doesn't suffer from depression or sustained periods of sadness, I would have thought I didn't have (much) darkness, and that I lived most of my life in the light. But now I am not so sure.
I didn't realize my need for control, my insomnia from all the endless worry, and the heaviness on my chest were all signs that I was actually spending far too much time in the darkness.
My own inner voice has been my lifelong ticket to visits into that darkness. The voice isn't strong enough to send me into a deep depression, or to turn me toward addictive behaviors, or even to show up in angry outbursts, but it can throw me off my game, quickly and simply. My inner voice is mean.
It's unforgiving. It's perfectionistic. It's relentless.
I've learned that I am not the only one with a harsh inner critic, some of you out there also have one. And you might not even know how much it influences you. How much it shames you. How it puts a chink in your self armor.
So my advice is that you start paying attention.
If you find it hard to believe in yourself, to trust your instincts, or to find the confidence to go forward, maybe you too have a harsh inner critic. And now you need to face her.
Slow down. Attempt quiet. Listen. And pay attention to what she says.
If you don't like what you hear, there are strategies that can help you change that voice to one of loving kindness toward yourself. I know it works, I've changed mine. I didn't even realize until after a recent reiki session that I am waaaay too hard on myself. And that I second guess things that most people let go immediately. All that rumination made for a mushroom cap of crap over my heart that never seemed to dissolve. Until I paid attention, until I started listening and took back my personal power.
We are all a work-in-progress. We all have "stuff". I am hoping to use my natural talents to help others get through their "stuff" and to live in the light.
If you need assistance, let me know.