I'm a Woman On Fire (Literally)
Okay so we all know that it has been HOT here in Michigan for weeks.
But I'm guessing that most of you are not molten centers of HOT lava from within, aka menopausal, in this HOT weather.
What you have then, with hot + hot flashes, is a woman on fire. Inside and out.
And in more ways than one. I had an epiphany last week. I uncovered my purpose in life. My purpose in life is to move people forward. It is as simple and as complicated as that. (more on this later)
And since then, I feel like my my brain is firing on all cylinders. Like I have woken up from a long sleep, and now I am fully awake and my brain's trying to make up for lost time. I can see clearly now.
That means I have a constant fire in my brain. A race to get the words and thoughts out as fast as they come to me. Which is Jimmy John's fast, and seem to occur 24/7.
Honestly, I am afraid if I don't get them all down on paper immediately, they will poof into thin air as fast as they mysteriously came. I do not want to lose them. I feel a sense of urgency---as if this won't last forever, so I need to take advantage of it while I can.
In reality I never want this this clarity of thoughts, ideas and words to ever end, but I know that it is inevitable. Because somedays I can't even find my car in the parking lot, or remember why I suddenly ran out of my office to go see...someone.
It's probably hormonal, this phase. This clarity. And the certainty I feel about everything, will fade. My sleepy brain will return; and I will be boring again. I will miss my chance at brilliance. And that makes me a million times sad.
Because I want to stay in this phase forever. Fully engaged. Fully charged. Fully energized. It's all so clear.
Truthfully I could do without the hot inner lava attacks which occur after every quick shift in thinking, every surge of emotion, and at every random inopportune moment followed immediately by the sweaty upper lip and hot knee backs, but the rest....the rest, is just pure heaven.