Sorry Guys, Pantiliners Happen

Are you a person who has embarrassing moments? Do you share them?

I do. (And I usually just share with family and close friends...but this time I thought I'd share one with all of you).

This story is old. Years old. It happened early in my paper career when I was a twenty something--wore short, tight skirts and carried a briefcase. Remember, not short skirts, briefcases. Hardly anyone carries them anymore, they are way too "old school."

Somewhere in the early 90's I was calling on a local University's graphic design department. (I sell paper, for those of you who haven't read my earlier posts) and I am what is called a specification rep. So my job is to work with anyone who designs with paper. I show samples, educate them about new papers, and help designers select the right paper for their job.

On this particular day I was updating this University's cabinet and showing a new promotion to the two male, older designers in the communications department. I cruise in in my short skirt, carrying my briefcase and the newest paper promotion. My first order of business was to update their cabinet. This action required that I pull out a form from my briefcase to use in checking off what they need replaced. No problem.

Or so I thought.

Little did I know that along with the form I pulled out, something else fell from my briefcase. Onto the floor in the middle of the room. Right there where everyone could see it.

Yep, you guessed it. A pantiliner.

Unused of course, but very obviously a feminine protection product. (Hey, a girl's gotta be prepared).

In the adjoining room while I updated the cabinet, I made small talk with the guys over my shoulder oblivious to the pantiliner on that floor. Finishing, I walked out into the main room and in mid sentence saw it lying there.

Face up. The only thing on the floor. Holy obvious. And there was little old me with the two older guys, no other girls anywhere to be seen. No chance this came from anyone but me.

In horror I realized three things simultaneously. #1) OMG that is a pantiliner on the floor.  #2) OMG that is my pantiliner on the floor. And #3) OMG they know it is my pantiliner on the floor.


So I did what any normal totally embarrassed girl in a skirt would do, I ignored it.

Yep, walked right by it as if it wasn't there. Heck no, there is no elephant in this room.

My face was surely red, my heart was beating way faster than normal, and of course, I had sweat pits.

But I plowed forward.

It might have been okay to just keep them focused on the new promotion I was showing, but then someone else came to the doorway of their little area with a question, and since that darn pantiliner was the only thing on the floor, nothing else was remotely close to it, they had to have noticed.

But they too, did not acknowledge that elephant in the room. So I just kept going and sweating. And I am positive I didn't say what I had rehearsed saying about the new promotion, because my mind was concentrating on what I was going to do next... how was I going to get that thing out of there. Gracefully. Quietly. Without actually having to acknowledge it?

Seeing as how leaving it there for them to pick up later was NOT an option, I did the only thing I could. I  finished my presentation, said my goodbyes, picked up my briefcase, bent down and snatched it up---an excellent scoop and squish move into my hand, and left the office. Quickly. Sweating all the way out.

Telling myself it was possible they never noticed.

Pretty sure they laughed about it all day, heck maybe even all week.

For the record, I soon stopped carrying the briefcase (and the just in case protection.)

There you have it, one of my most embarrassing moments e-v-e-r!

Care to share yours?