If you could see yourself the way I do...

You would never doubt your beauty. Your strength. Your creativity. Or your talents.

You would never, ever doubt your intrinsic worth.

You bring an incredibly special light to this world just by being authentically you, even on the days you feel less than bright.

So many of us believe that we need to be fixed. That we need to be better. That we need to be something we are not. And we are SO very hard on ourselves. Our mean voice never gives us a break, never allows us to feel the warmth of a compliment, or bask in the glow of a job well done. We are always qualifying, defending, apologizing so someone else doesn't suck the wind out of our sails and criticize us first. We want to be the first to expose our weaknesses, to let the world know that we are aware of what we could have done better, because deep down we are so afraid that we will fall apart if you tell us what we fear most, that we did it wrong, or worse that we failed. 

Some of us do not remember a time when we didn't try so hard.

But there was a time once. A time when we believed we could be anything we wanted to be, when we unapologetically let our talents shine and when we never doubted our purpose, or that we mattered, and mostly when we didn't struggle to be (the elusive) "more".

We need to get back to that time when we were enough just as we were and when the voice in our head loved us, instead of always disapproving of the way we did things.

We must stop comparing ourselves to others, quit striving to be perfect, cease wanting everyone to like us, and begin loving ourselves, not trying to get others to love us. We need to lose the ridiculously high standard we hold ourselves to, so that our light can begin to shine bright again.

Like it once did, when we were innocent and free of the load of shame and guilt we've collected as we've grown.

Don't let your own mean voice dim your brilliant light. Stop thinking of yourself as a being who needs work and improvement, instead view yourself the way the world sees you: as Beautiful. Unique. Special. Full of potential. Perfectly Imperfect.

We often have no problem seeing others for who they are, appreciating their strengths and accepting their weaknesses. See yourself in the same forgiving light, stop comparing, stop measuring, stop judging yourself and simply LOVE yourself for the unique being you are.

You are a warrior.

Strong, solid, courageous, gorgeous and kind. You have talent, grace, beauty and wisdom that no one else has. Use your strengths, shine your brightest light out into the world without worry, without fear, without moderation.  

Do not dim your light for anyone. If someone cannot handle your brilliance, they are not meant to be in your life. If your mean voice is not supportive, shut it down immediately, and search out your inner cheerleader.

She sees your brilliance. She's cheering for you. Can you hear her?

Speak in a kinder, gentler voice to yourself and remember how much you are loved.

 

I might have mentioned in earlier posts that I am a "doer"; I have been as long as I can remember. Throughout my life people have used words like: organized, responsible, conscientious, efficient and bossy to describe me. Until recently that is, lately I've heard words like kind, brave, and "a  blessing".

Is this a new thing, the result of changes I have been making in me? Or, have those things always been said about me, only I wasn't listening for them?

I know I have always tended to measure my worth in how much I get done, how many things I cross off my to do list, or how big my contribution to helping something go smoothly was. I pretty much never say that something I do is "good enough", I always strive to make it the best it can be. I can always find fault, or ways to improve it.

But I have to admit I am tired. I'm tired of paddling upstream. Of never accomplishing enough, or doing it as good as I think I should.

It is impossible to keep up all that internal pressure.  I've seen what it is like to enjoy the moment and to go with the flow, to stop trying to control everything. I like this way better. I'm going to keep making sure I do more of this in my life. Taking time to chill. To think. To just "be".

I see now how important it is to have the other side in your life-- the side that appreciates the moment, the stop-and-smell-the-roses-side, the side that notices and savors the little things. I have learned the hard way that you cannot always make things happen by sheer will and energy --you need to give things space to "allow" for them to happen. To grow.  And to blossom in their own time.

It's become "clear" to me recently in several different ways that allowing time for "me", time to chill, and to enjoy life is where the clarity I've been seeking lives.

Question of the Week #25 / How Much "Me" Time Do You Allow For Yourself?

Finding my own true voice is the biggest and brightest thing I can do for my future. And the only way I hear that voice is to make time to listen.

Focusing inward is not selfish, it is necessary. And so is spending time with ourselves.  If your answer to the question above is "not a lot", or what is "me" time? then it is more important than ever that you start making that time. In whatever way works for you.

Because you are entirely worth it.

And so am I.